THINGS WE LEARNED FROM THE 82ND OSCARS

image property of McDonalds 

We talked about the Oscars on today's show, but there were a few things we didn't get to mention, so here are some of the things we learned from watching this years Oscars:

Sam Worthington replaces Russell Crowe as Grumpy Australian guy
When Steve Martin maced the digital forest spirits from Avatar, causing them to die, the show cut to Sam Worthington sitting there with a look on his face that seemed to say "I am not amused!"

Macaulay Culkin is kinda creepy
During the John Hughes "in memoriam" segment, they cut to Macaulay Culkin delivering a Hughes story with such creepy penache and odd akward pauses, it makes me wonder if he's used to petting a cat while trying to dismember British Secret Agents with a laser.

Ben Stiller wants you to know he has Supreme Geek Cred. 
 While dressed as Weird-Kid-in-Class Smurf, Stiller lamented that instead of wearing Na'vi makeup he should have worn his "2 pairs of Spock ears from the original series... signed by Leonard Nimoy!" Then, to make sure he wouldn't be seen as the geeky guy by all his cool movie star peers, he said he decided it would have been "too nerdy."


What Precious is Actually About
Like a lot of people we didn't see Precious, and didn't really know too much about it before the show. Luckily, thanks to the clip for the movie that the Oscars played for the Best Adapted Screenplay award, we now realize that Precious is about a Chicken Bucket Thief! Once we noticed this, like anyone we just assumed it was some sort of origin movie for the Hamburgler, perhaps the alternate title was Precious: Rise of the Hamburgler? Other clips of the film were shown later which, though moving, seemed like a typical Hollywood departure from the original Hamburgler source material.

Violence Good, Texting Bad 
We were pretty surprised how much violence was showcased during this years Oscars, between the gore in the Horror montage (they actually showed Kathy Bates breaking James Caan's leg with a sledgehammer in Misery!!!!) and in the other segments (like Hugo from Inglorious Basterds shooting a Nazi in the junk with blood flying everywhere!!!) the Academy seemed rather bloodthirsty. Luckily the Academy did have it's moral limits and when the team from The Cove came up to receive their Best Documentary Oscar, the show quickly started the music and cut away before any children watching could be bombared with graphic images of senseless texting!

Virtually No One Applauded at Micheal Jackson during the "In Memoriam" Montage
Yeah...

 Helen Mirren Has a Tatoo!
Thanks to Michael Sheen we all found out Helen Mirren has a Spiderweb tatoo on her hand! Very cool, but doesn't each layer of webbing represent a vato she iced? At least that's what prison movies taught us!

WOW, WE LEARNED A LOT THIS OSCARS!!!!!!